Orchard Ridge United Church of Christ

Ken’s Pennings

People will visit a church for a variety of reasons, but it’s almost always true that they will not return unless they feel warmly welcomed. And the best hospitality goes far beyond a handshake; it should run through the entire life of the congregation. Please take this brief quiz, and be thinking, “Can Orchard Ridge become even more hospitable?”

Questions:
True / False

1. Most people want to be introduced to the whole congregation the first time they attend a worship service.
2. In today’s culture, people will think you are being too pushy if you extend an invitation to brunch or dinner the first time you meet them in a worship service.
3. Name tags annoy some of us, but they are still a very good thing both for visitors and for long-time members.
4. The best follow-up to a visitor to church is a personal letter from the pastor.
5. Most people visit churches today because of radio and television advertisements.
6. In conversations with first-time visitors to worship, church school, or other activities, be careful not to ask questions that put the other person on the spot.
7. Only about one in five churches provide any training to greeters or ushers on how to respond to children.
8. Most churches are not actually as friendly as they think they are.
9. Most visitors to churches today want to get lost in a large crowd and to be left alone.

Answers:
1. False – Research shows that only about one-third of first-time visitors want to be introduced to the whole congregation. Two-thirds definitely do not want to be put on the spot with such an introduction. In a large church, it probably isn’t realistic to have people introduced to the whole church during worship; but even in a very small congregation, it’s not a good idea to automatically introduce visitors.

2. False – While not everyone will accept such an invitation the first time it is extended, virtually everyone appreciates being invited to share in brunch or in dinner. Growing churches have a congregational culture in which people are very quick to extend invitations to meals to those who visit.

3. True – Name tags do annoy many of us! But they are virtually invaluable for visitors, and they are also a help to long-time members. Unless the congregation is very small, many members do not know each other–though some may be embarrassed to admit it. Name tags help everyone.

4. False – A letter from the pastor is fine, but the best follow-up is a visit from someone in the congregation. Growing churches tend to have a follow-up visit made within 48-hours of the time a person visits the church. Usually this is for the purpose of bringing a gift like homemade bread, cookies, popcorn, a coffee mug, or a devotional book – perhaps also with some printed information about the church. There’s no need to go inside the home for a visit–simply come to the door, share the gift and thanks for the person or family having attended, and leave. If the person being visited wants to talk more, fine. But the short visit accompanied by a gift can have great power.

5. False – Most people visit churches for the first time because a family member, friend, coworker, or neighbor invited them to come. Radio and television ads have impact in some urban areas, but most churches can’t afford enough air time to have any significant impact. The person-to-person approach is the best one–and the most hospitable one!

6. True – Of course! But we often violate this obvious guideline. There is a natural tendency to ask repeated questions to discover whether or not we know the family of the person who is visiting. But that makes it sound like we aren’t really interested in the visitor unless we have some kind of family tie. Another common error comes in assuming that an adult visitor accompanied by a child must have a spouse who is not along. We are living in a time with many single parents, who will not appreciate the assumption that they have a spouse.

7. True – Research has shown that only about 20% of churches provide greeters and ushers with any training on how to relate to children. The result is that children are often ignored or annoyed by a condescending adult who gives a pat on the head! Greeters and ushers should acknowledge children with direct eye contact and with the same interest and courtesy extended to adults. It’s very good for a welcomer to bend down to greet a young child on his or her level.

8. True – In more than 90% of 1,400 congregations surveyed, visitors and newer members do not think the church is as warmly hospitable as long-time members think it is.

9. False – It is true that there are people who visit churches who want to have a sense of anonymity, and those persons are especially likely to seek out very large congregations where it feels easier to keep a low initial profile. But most visitors to most churches are hungry for a connection with others. They may be shy in social settings and not take the initiative, but most people want to connect with others. While it is true that two-third of first-time visitors do not want to be introduced to the whole congregation, that doesn’t mean they want to be ignored! They anticipate and hope that those around them will greet them and make them feel welcome.